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(1 heartbreakers | victim of love)

mmmm..... [17 Jan 2004|10:23pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

i have been writing a lot lately...im starting to write a story and also have been writing poems and it feels so good in my soul to just write. and let all my feelings out. i feel so good right now. just being able to enjoy life. writing my one love is holding on for me. it comes from my soul

(1 heartbreakers | victim of love)

goodbye to you [16 Jan 2004|10:11pm]
[ mood | worried ]

lori is gone....shes in juvy. i miss her

anyways...im sorry for the fights im sorry that i get so jealous but i don't know how else to react my jealousy takes a hold of me and doesn't let go. and then i explode and i don't know how else to react. becuz it hurts me so much inside cuz i don't know how to think or anything sometimes and i care about u so much you don't even know how much. but i just wish we could get along sometimes and not fight...so im sorry and i love you.

(1 heartbreakers | victim of love)

awww.... [13 Jan 2004|08:00pm]
[ mood | sad ]

awww....loris gone and i miss her.

(victim of love)

[10 Jan 2004|10:21pm]
[ mood | bored ]

a p p e a r a n c e

HEIGHT: 5'5
HAIR COLOR: brown
SKIN COLOR: sorta pale
EYE COLOR: blue grey
PIERCINGS: ears
TATTOOS: none = ( soon?

r i g h t n o w

WHAT COLOR PANTS ARE YOU WEARING?: pair a jeans tee...shoes nothing
exciting
WHAT SONG ARE YOU LISTENING TO?: radio
WHAT TASTE IS IN YOUR MOUTH?: mmmmmm...pizza
WHAT'S THE WEATHER LIKE?: cold as FUCK
HOW ARE YOU?i feel alone...like i am completely alone...and sick of life

d o y o u

GET MOTION SICKNESS?: no
HAVE A BAD HABIT?: saying im sorrry
GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS?: we arent close
LIKE TO DRIVE?: yes

f a v o r i t e s

TV SHOW: cops, charmed, real world
CONDITIONER: the cheap stuff
BOOK: right now white oleander
MAGAZINE: none
NON-ALCOHOLIC DRINK: pepsi
THING TO DO ON THE WEEKEND: drink chill
BAND OR GROUP or SINGER or RAPPER: tupac...ummm good charlotte

h a v e y o u

BROKEN THE LAW: havent been caught yet
RAN AWAY FROM HOME: no
SNUCK OUT OF THE HOUSE: umm no left notes in middle of night though and left
EVER GONE SKINNY DIPPING: no thanks
MADE A PRANK PHONE CALL: i don’t think so
EVER TIPPED OVER A PORTA POTTY: no
USED YOUR PARENTS' CREDIT CARD BEFORE: no way
SKIPPED SCHOOL BEFORE: duh...oh course
FELL ASLEEP IN THE SHOWER/BATH: one time when i was really really drunk
BEEN IN A SCHOOL PLAY: in like 1st grade
LET A FRIEND CRY ON YOUR SHOULDER: yes...im always there if someone needs
me

l o v e

BOYFRIEND: yes
GIRLFRIEND: nope
SEXUALITY: i like boys
CHILDREN: eventually
CURRENT CRUSH: hello? boyfriend
BEEN IN LOVE?: yes
HAD A HARD TIME GETTING OVER SOMEONE: definatly.
BEEN HURT?: plenty.
YOUR GREATEST REGRET: ummm....crying over someone who didn’t deserve tears
GONE OUT WITH A SOMEONE YOU ONLY KNEW FOR THREE DAYS: ummm
yes

r a n d o m

DO YOU HAVE A JOB: yes
YOUR CD PLAYER HAS IN IT RIGHT NOW: nothing dont have one

IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?: bright pink
WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY?: right now it seems like nothing does
WHO MAKES YOU THE HAPPIEST?: like i said really nothin
WHAT'S THE NEXT CD YOU'RE GONNA GET?: never have money for cds.

WHO DO YOU CONSIDER GOOD FRIENDS?: rashel,my boyfriend

WHAT DO YOU LIKE TO DO?: sleep listen to music

w h e n / w h a t w a s t h e l a s t

TIME YOU CRIED?: today
YOU GOT A REAL LETTER?: in april
YOU GOT E-MAIL: today
THING YOU PURCHASED: cigerette
TV PROGRAM YOU WATCHED: real world
MOVIE YOU SAW AT THE THEATER: ummmm......texas chainsaw massacare with
lorilee

y o u r t h o u g h t s o n

ABORTION: ummm...i think the women should be able to choose what they want to do
TEENAGE SMOKING: ummm i smoke so i have no opionion
SPICE GIRLS: ummmmmm?
DREAMS: ok

(victim of love)

grow up [09 Jan 2004|10:59am]
[ mood | frustrated ]

so icame home last night and the parents...shut it. we are moving in a year what ru gonna do. you need to get your life together and figure out how u want your'e life to be. I REFUSE TO GO WITH THEM.THAT IS NOT AN OPTION.so now i have to try to find a place to live...better car...and good job before they leave.in a year. because after that it is doney. gotta go.
peACe

(victim of love)

[09 Jan 2004|01:39am]
alcohol



You are Alcohol!


A little sloppy, a little hungry, and a whole lot horny.

So what if you've had a drunken fling or two with puke still in your hair?

You're the life of the party - well, if you can get invited...



What Drug Are You?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

(1 heartbreakers | victim of love)

wrap me up and keep me warm [07 Jan 2004|04:46pm]
[ mood | aggravated ]

why is it that it always seems that when things seem to be getting better everything gets worse? oh....well. don't matter. work completely sucks.i hate it. but i geuss it is better then nothing right? i applied at snookers...i hope i get it i wanna work in a bar/pool place. anyways gotta go. peaCE.

(victim of love)

www.playmash.com [06 Jan 2004|11:46pm]
[ mood | surprised ]

You will live in Apartment.
You will drive a white ESCORT.
You will marry jeremy and have 5 kids.
You will be a crisis line help in michigan.

ok....wow...just wow.

(1 heartbreakers | victim of love)

[31 Dec 2003|01:06pm]
[ mood | amused ]

What will your Funeral be like? by rashock
Username
You will die by:You body was found mangled in a brutal death from an insane lover or jealous significate other.The murderer was sentenced to death row but the chair or gas was too good for them. They sowed you up in a bag and tossed you in your casket, It's a closed case unless your friends and family want to be sick.
Death Date:November 18, 2015
Number attending your funeral?179
How much will you leave to friends and family?$3,097,005
Created with quill18's MemeGen!



really nice, huh? murder..

(victim of love)

good charlotte [31 Dec 2003|01:07am]
[ mood | calm ]

This world, this world is so cold
But you don't, you don't have to go
you're feeling sad you're feeling lonely
And no one seems to care
Your mother's gone and your father hits
You this pain you cannot bare
But we all bleed the same way as you do
We all have the same things to go through
Hold on... if you feel like letting go
Hold on... it gets better than you know
Your days you say they're way too long
And your nights you can't sleep at all
And you're not sure what you're looking for
But you don't want to no more
And you're not sure what you're waiting for but you don't want to no more
But we all bleed the same way as you do
WWe all have the same th ings to go through
Hold on... if you feel like letting go
Hold on... it gets better than you know
Don't stop looking you're one step closer
Don't stop searching it's not over...hold on
What are you looking for?
What are you waiting for?
Do you know what you're doing to me?
Go ahead...what are you waiting for?
Hold on... if you feel like letting go
Hold on... it gets better than you know


this song made me cry the first time ive heard it

(2 heartbreakerss | victim of love)

You said everything that no one else said, [29 Dec 2003|06:08pm]
[ mood | crappy ]

i was just wondering for anyone who has been in a relationship and been hurt really really bad...but went back to that person. did you get over what they did to you? did you forgive them?becuase ive been through that recently and i feel like i am losing my mind. cuz i all i feel is anger andresentment towards him...i mean i love him with all my heart but i feel like im not over what happened yet and it is so hard.....i just wanna forget about it all.and i am so sick of thinking about it and feeling the way i feel.
then last night i drank at dianes house....not a lot a couple white russians papya juice and vodka and a couple beers.... so i woke up with a hangover i don't know why i never use to get them...now the past 2 times i drank i got a hangover and i didn't drink that much...is that i sign of anything...????peACe

(1 heartbreakers | victim of love)

ehh? [28 Dec 2003|01:55am]
[ mood | content ]

well christmas was ok i geuss...my x-mas present to my parents was spending time with them so i had to do the whole family thing. even though when i got there NO ONE knew who i was cuz i have changed so much in the past year. crazy, huh? my uncle stared at me for like 15 minutes before he recognized me. anyways i was really uncomfortable their. i didn't feel like i could be me. i would have rather been with my other family...boyfriend his mom sis and family &friends. i am comfortable around them and i love them awww. his grandmother bought me a present...and his mom said shed take me shopping..awww...its so swweet anyways i gotta go its late work was boring as fuck.but i really do need someone to talk to and i have people i just can't share certain info withthem. well pEAce

(1 heartbreakers | victim of love)

[27 Dec 2003|11:54am]
meghan sorry i had to see if i could update this journal cos mine wont let me update.

-lori

(victim of love)

merry christmas [25 Dec 2003|01:04am]
[ mood | blah ]

hey....
umm well its christmas eve i had an ok day. actually seemed to get along with everyone. tommorow its the family thing... and then to my other familys (my boy) house. i want tommorrow to be a good day cuz im sick of not being happy.well peACe

(victim of love)

growing up is sometimes hard to do [22 Dec 2003|09:10pm]
[ mood | numb ]

i am at the point right now where i know who i am ...and who i could be. and i wanna be that person that i could be but i am scared.

(victim of love)

[22 Dec 2003|01:25pm]
[ mood | bored ]

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME</p>

01 | sleeping alone at night

02 | ending up alone

03 | sometimes the future

THREE PEOPLE WHO MAKE ME LAUGH

01 | rashel

02 | jeremy

03 | lori

THREE THINGS I LOVE

01 | jeremy

02 | my family

03 | writing

THREE THINGS I HATE

01 | broken promises

02 | being cheated on

03 | getting hurt

THREE THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND

01 | why for some people life is soo easy and for others all they do is suffer

02 | why i am so depressed

03 | god

THREE THINGS ON MY DESK

01 | pens

02 | paper

03 | booklet from baker

THREE THINGS I'M DOING RIGHT NOW

01 | listening to twiztid

02 | filling this thing out

03 | worrying

THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE

01 | find happiness

02 | run away from my life ...start over...with some things still in my life...

03 | have kids

THREE THINGS I CAN DO

01 | go to work

02 | go back to school

03 | eventually start over...hopefully

THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY

01 | understanding

02 | too nice

03 | sensitive

THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY LOOKS

01 | 5'5

02 | blondish brown hair

03 | pale

THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO

01 | say no and mean it

02 | sometimes be strong

03 | feel satisfied with my life (right now)

THREE THINGS I THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO

01 |anything u want

02 | good charlotte

03 | tupac

THREE THINGS I DON'T THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO EVER

01 | ??????????

02 | some country

03 | ummmm...whatever you dont wanna listen to

THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST:

01 | wow

02 | im sorry

03 | leave me alone...i don't wanna talk about it

THREE OF YOUR ABSOLUTE FAVORITE FOODS

01 | pizza

02 | mmm....burger king cookies

03 | apples

THREE THINGS YOU'D LIKE TO LEARN

01 | self-defense

02 | how to be happy

03 | how to say no

THREE BEVERAGES YOU DRINK REGULARLY

01 | wild cherry pepsi

02 | orange crush

03 | moutain dew

THREE SHOWS YOU WATCHED WHEN YOU WERE A KID

01 | carebears

02 | smerfs

03 | rugrats

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO

01 | europe

02 | new york

03 | australia

001. What is your name? meghan

002. Spell your name backwards. nahgem

003. Date of birth: sept. 21,1982

004. Male or female? female

005. Astrological sign: virgo

006. Nicknames: Megster

007. Occupation? driv-thru at arbys

008. Height: 5'5"?

009. Weight: ummm...why do u wanna know???

010. Hair color: a mixture of blondes and browns

012. Where were you born? detriot

013. Where do you reside now? chesterfield

014. Age: 21

015. Screen names: stoleninnosense

016. E-mail addy: stoleninnosense or sullenbutterfly@aol.com

017. What does your screen name stand for?kinda speaks for itself doesn't it

018. What is your LJ name? themisfitsfiend

020. Pets: kitty, dog, and doggy at jeremys

021. Number of candles you blew out on your last birthday cake? like 4

022. Piercings? 3 in one ear one in other

023. Tattoo's? not yet

024. Shoe size: 9

025. Righty or lefty? righty

026. Wearing:the clash tee, black and white striped pants

027. Hearing:tupac

028. Feeling: lonely, worried

029. Eating/drinking: pepsi

~Guys/Love/Kissing/And Other Stuff~

061. Have you ever been in love? yes

062. How many people have you told? 3

063. How many people have you been in love with? in love 1 loved 2

064. How many people have you kissed? umm alot hah

065. Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex? yes

066. How many people have you dated? uhm ....6-10

067. What do you look for in a girl? nuthin im strait with gurls

068. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? arms...eyes

069. What type of girl do you usually go for? strictlydick

070. Do you have a bf/gf? yes

071. If so where did you meet them? party

072. What do you like most about your bf/gf? how strong he is emotionally

075. Do you believe in love at first sight? no ,lust at first site- yes

076. Do you remember your first love?yes

077. Who is the first person you kissed? keith

078. Do you believe in fate? yes

079. Do you believe in soul mates? yes

080. If so do you believe you'll ever find yours? i think i already have

~Favorites~

152. Color: blue or pink

153. Food: pizza

154. Song: hold on...good charlotte

155. Show: charmed

158. Animal: tigers

160. Radio station: 93.1, 95.5 97.9 99.5 105.9 93.9 105.1 104.3 ilove musik..88.7

168. Alcholic drink: vodka, white russians, beer

169. Holiday: halloween

170. Perfume/cologne: lucky

~This or that~

219. Coke/Pepsi:pepsi

220. Doughnuts/bagels: bagels

221. Day/night: night as long as im with sumone

222. Wicked witch of the east/wicked witch of the west: east

224. Make love/have sex: make love..if its romantic..but if not..strait up sex

225. Coffee/tea: coffee

226. Hamburgers/hotdogs: hamburger

227. Rap/rock: rap

228. Britney/Christina: Britney

229. Swiss cheese/american cheese: neither

230. Real World/Road Rules: Real world

231. Backstreet Boys/*Nsync: *Nsync

232. Silver/gold: Silver

233. Nike/Adidas: Adidas

234. McDonalds/Taco Bell: taco bell...

235. Sweet/sour: sweet;-p

236. Punk/emo: Punk

237. Hot/cold: hot

238. Winter/summer: Summer

239. Spring/fall: fall

240. Operas/plays: Plays

241. Read/watch tv: tv

242. Cd's/tapes: cds

243. Dvd's/vhs: dvd

244. Old/new: new

245. Shorts/skirts: skirts

246. Pink/red: pink

247. Colored pictures/black and white photos: black and white

248. Meat/vegetables: vegs

249. Mexican food/chinese food: mexican

250. Commercials/infomercials: commericals

251. Scary movies/comedies: scary

252. Bikinis/one piece bathing suits: bikinis

253. Sandals/tennis shoes: sandels

254. Dogs/cats: dogs

255. Unicorns/fairies: unicorns

256. Water/land: water

257. Sugar/spice: Sugar

258. Black/white: black

259. ribbons/bows: ribbons

260. Chicken/beef: chicken

261. Colored christmas lights/regular white christmas lights: white ones

262. Cars/trucks: cars

263. Austin Powers/James Bond: austin powers

264. Popcorn/pretzels: popcorn

265. Hip/hop: hip hop..

266. Passionate kiss/peck: passionate....

267. WWE wrestling/ real wrestling WWE

268. Back rub/foot massage: back rub

269. Picture frames/photo albums:it depends

270. Pens/pencils: Pens

~What Is Your Opinion Of The Following~

271. Eminem: hes a cute boy and i like his flow

272. Virgins: great great

273. God: does he really exist

281. Homosexuals: no problem with em

282. Abortion: its all up to the individual

283. Inter-racial relationships: if ur in love..race shoodnt mater

284. Murder: dumb

285. death: if it happens it happen

287. Pre-marital sex: yeah its strait

288. Terrorism: dumb

289. Pornography: haha do what u do

290. Fortune tellers: tyte

291. Threesomes: fun

292. Prostitution: no comment

293. Politics: ????

294. Country music: depends

298. Gas prices in America: crazy!

~Have You Ever.~

331. Mooned anyone? no

332. Been on a diet? eating dis. count?

333. Been to a foreign country? canadia? haha

334. Broken a bone? my wrist

335. Swallowed a tooth/cap/filling? doubt it

336. Swear at a teacher? i think so

338. Got in a fight? yelling matches that bout it

339. Dated a teacher? naw

340. Laughed so hard you peed your pants? maybe

341. Thought about killing your enemy? yeah but never wood do it

342. Gone skinny dipping? no

344. Told a little white lie? little? um a few..then regret it.

345. Told a secret you swore not to tell? maybe long time go

346. Stolen anything? ya....

347. Miss used a swear word and it sounded absolutely stupid? ha sure

353. Loved someone so much it makes you cry? yes

354. Decieved somebody close to you???? yes

355. Broken the law? ya

359. Been on an airplane? yes!

361. Came close to dying? i geuss...not really

362. Cheated on a bf/gf?yes

363. Gave someone a piggy back ride? hah yes

365. Made a mud pie? when iw as a lil gurlie

366. Had a dream that our falling off a cliff? yeah but i never hit bottom

367. Snuck out of the house at night? kinda

368. Been so drunk you don't remember your name? aha no.. i dont kno if its possible but ive been completely wasted

369. Had an eating disorder? ...yes

370. Felt like you didn't belong? yeah

371. Felt like the 3rd wheel? yes

372. Smoked? ..yes

373. Done drugs? ..smoked pot...other things

374. Been arrested? nope

375. Had your tonsils removed? nope

376. Gone to camp? naw

377. Won a bet? ?????

378. Written a love letter? yeah..but love?

379. Gone out of your way to be with the one you love? yeah

380. Written a love poem? yes

381. Kissed in the rain? no but i really woood like to it wood be lovely

383. Participated in cyber sex? no

384. Faked an orgasm? ...yes

385. Stolen a kiss? naw

386. Asked a friend for relationship advice? yeah

387. Had a friend steal your bf/gf? yes goddamit

388. Watched the sunset/rise with someone you love? no it wood be cute tho

389. Gotten a speeding ticket? yes was put on probation for it

390. Done jail time? naw

391. Had to wear a uniform to work? yea

392. Won a trophy? no

393. Thrown up in public: at the moviesP>

394. Bowled a perfect game? um no lol

395. Failed/got held back? naw

396. Got perfect attendance in grade school? highly doubt

397. Roasted pumpkin seeds? yah

398. Taken ballet lessons: yes

399. Attempted suicide? sort of

400. Cut yourself? used to

443. Do you believe in God?i don't know

444. Do you believe in Satan? i don't know

445. Do you believe there is a heaven? yeah

446. Do you believe there is a hell? yesh

447. Do you own a pooltable? no

448. Do you have a pool no

449. Do you have a dishwasher in your kitchen? Yah

450. Do you like chocolate? ehh once amonth

451. Who/what is on your 2003 calendar: cats i think

452. How many U.S. states have you been to? 4

453. Ever wished on a shooting star? yah...

454. Best Halloween costume you ever wore? dunno

456. What is your weakness? jealousy

459. How many kids do you want to have? at least 2

460. Future daughters names: madison, mackenzie or isabella

461. Future sons names:issac

462. What is your ideal way to die? in my sleep

463. How do you release stress? loud music

480. Let’s say you win the lotto. What do you do with all that money? lots of shit...and share withalot of ppl

481. Do you have a check book? no lol

482. Do you like your driver’s license picture?yes

(2 heartbreakerss | victim of love)

i did a bad bad thing [22 Dec 2003|08:17am]
[ mood | lonely ]

ok so i got my boyfriend fired from his job ...sort of. i woke him up 2 hours late and they fired him but he was already on the edge to begin with

anyways....still alot on my mind just wish i had someone to talk to about it.

(victim of love)

lost [20 Dec 2003|01:47pm]
[ mood | confused ]

have you ever been so lost in your mind it fucking pissed you off? so confused and lost that you don't know what to do anymore....well that is where i am right now...and the one person i can talk to....well...i don't wanna talk about that. i just wish i could get all of this off of my mind and talk to someone about it.just let the tears and anger flow out of me .. im sick of being so angry and sad all the time i want to be happy...do you blame me?

(victim of love)

help me [19 Dec 2003|02:22pm]
[ mood | bored ]

[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<h/3>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]

<h/3>can someone please show me how to change the backround on my journal? please? <h/3>

anyways got to see my nieces...oh god they are so adorable i miss em so much. ya well i gotta go. peACe

(victim of love)

snow snow go away [15 Dec 2003|01:02pm]
[ mood | moody ]

well the boyfriend didn't go to jail. thank god. he has a heavy probation though owes like $800 within a month has to take drug tests and classes ....you know the usual. but if he violates he willgo to jail even longer.hopefully he stays good.ipray to god he doesn't go back.
had to work all weekend and it wasn't fun.took some energy pills on saturday but...they didn't last long enough.

cant anyone see these tears?
the tears that are falling from my eyes?
the tears caused by hurt and by pain?
that will never again be seen by you,
cuz really, you havent got a clue.

theres been alot on my mind lately but i really don't know who to talk to about all of it so now im keeping it in. and i don't know how to deal with all these feelings.

can someone please tell me how to change the backround and icon on this journal? thanks!!!!

peACe

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